Relationship Counseling, Marriage Counseling, Couple Counseling, Attachment Therapy Allen Counseling Center

Information and Articles for Communication Issues, Marriage Communication, Couples Issues, Friendship Issues, Attachment Issues

7 Ways to Know You’re an Awesome Mom

Being a Mom is tough work, we Moms know that. There are times we don't live up to the expectations we have for ourselves, and as a therapist, I find myself needing to let Moms know just how awesome they are. So, I put together a list of ways to know that you are an awesome mom! The most important thing about being an awesome mom is knowing who you are and what you are becoming. You are so much more than Just-a-Mom. Your life is way more than the identifying work, "Mom." You juggle so many things in your life, from being an Kid-Uber driver to rockin' it at the office. Pantsuit by day, messy bun by night, and what you have in between is [Read more...]

By Amanda Myers, M.Ed., LPC, RPT|Tags: awesome mom, parent coaching, parenting is hard, screwing up my kids|

Listening to Your Gut: How To Handle “Off” Situations

We have likely all experienced a time when we’ve noticed something “off” about someone we care for. It can often be unclear as to what our role is when we make this observation, but when our gut gets moving, I think it's important to take action! It could be something simply, like your friend is having a bad day. Or, it could be that this person is genuingly in trouble and thinking of something like suicide. Do you say something? Do you leave them alone to handle what they need to? Depending on your relationship with the person, you may say something immediately or wait until later. The fact of the matter is, we don’t know until we ask how we may be of help [Read more...]

By Lyndsey Perry, M.A., LPC-Intern|Tags: Friends, helping, support|

5 Text-Based Ways to Show Your Partner Love

Gary Chapman describes the idea of love languages which basically says that there are five different ways couples express and experience love, says EveWoman. The first one is through words of affirmation then through quality time followed by giving gifts, acts of service and physical touch. Knowing these things can help you build a stronger emotional bond between you and your partner. Know each other’s language Given that idea, it’s essential that you find out what your partner’s love language is. What does she do to express her love for your? For instance, does your spouse or partner love to cuddle up to you? Does she often ask for hugs or does she like it when you’re both on the couch, in each other arms [Read more...]

By Jennifer Slingerland Ryan, Ph.D., LPC|

Physical Touch vs Sex: Love Language Matters

Our culture, more or less, predisposes us to think of ourselves as sexual creatures. From the movies we imbibe to the books we devour, our unending fascination with and interest in all things sexual has been well documented throughout ages of human civilizations. A book was even written on the topic of love languages, which includes physical touch. Knowing your spouse's love language as well as your own, can be incredibly helpful. Sex vs Physical touch: which matters more? In romantic relationships, sex is an essential part of the dynamic. More than the sex, though, touch can be a much more important element in the relationship. Here’s why: It’s a form of communication One of the many things more important than sex in a relationship is [Read more...]

By Jennifer Slingerland Ryan, Ph.D., LPC|Tags: love languages, physical touch, sex|

Being a Single Parent and Falling In Love Again

There are 13.7 million single parents in the US who are raising about 22 million children, based on a report released by the Census Bureau. That amounts to about 26 percent of children under 21 in America today, The Spruce says. Given the complications of trying to start a relationship when a child is involved, it’s not altogether surprising that the average single parent is wary of falling in love again. The hurdle of time One of the reasons why single parents find it hard to find romantic partners is the lack of time. In the UK, about 70 percent of single parents do not get any opportunities to meet anyone new in their lives. About 80 percent, on the other hand, do not have [Read more...]

By Jennifer Slingerland Ryan, Ph.D., LPC|Tags: single dad, single mom, single parent|

5 Words We Need to Stop Using in Relationships

There are words we all use that seem innocuous. However, some of them are nefarious whether we realize it or not. Love is strong but very fragile at the same time, so handling feelings with care is always necessary. Here are five words you should ditch immediately to improve how you communicate with your partner. 1. Stop “Nagging” Me This word is a serious trigger for a lot of people, but especially women. Ravishly points out that women and men communicate differently, with women being more likely to be verbal. Therapy can help a lot when it comes to bridging a gap in communication, especially with the help of an Allen-based therapist. This word infers that emotions are empty complaints and invalidates feelings, and is [Read more...]

By Jennifer Slingerland Ryan, Ph.D., LPC|Tags: Allen based therapist, Allen family counselor|

Identifying Your Own Love Language

“Love languages” is a specific term pioneered by Dr. Gary Chapman in his groundbreaking book The Five Love Languages: How to Express Heartfelt Commitment to Your Mate which provides a structured approach to understanding how love is expressed and received by individuals. The five love languages are revolutionary in how emotions can be interpreted and understood, and for many people, helps to stop the guessing game about feelings. Here’s a primer on how love languages can help improve communication in your relationship. What It’s All About Love languages are separated by Dr. Chapman into five different categories: Words of Affirmation: This is essentially verbal communication of validation. Compliments are of supreme importance for people who thrive off this type of love language. Acts of Service: [Read more...]

By Jennifer Slingerland Ryan, Ph.D., LPC|Tags: love languages, marriage counseling|

Rediscovering Your Spouse: Winter Activities to Reconnect

At I Choose Change, we encourage change that lasts a lifetime. That’s why every month, we’ll take a closer look at the issues that affect you and your family. In January, we’ll focus on resolutions and starting over, then we’ll switch gears and delve into doing the right thing and justice. I Choose Change serves all of Allen, Plano, McKinney, Wylie, Lucas, Sachse and Fairview, and we offer online and email counseling across the globe. Contact us here for more information. Winter Activities As 2018 commences, while many people are full of hope and the “new year, new me” mindset, there’s also the downside of the typical post-holiday letdown. These two elements can mix and lead to toxic ideas about what reinvention truly means, particularly [Read more...]

By Jennifer Slingerland Ryan, Ph.D., LPC|Tags: Allen family counseling, Dallas area therapist, marriage, reconnect|

Understanding the Anatomy of a Fight and How to Heal

Every couple fights. It’s an inevitable fact, ranging from doozies you remember for years, to minor spats over taking out the garbage. The fact is, though, that rarely are disagreements actually about the subject at hand. Anger is hard to express in a healthy way for many people, both to themselves and to their partner. Not only that, but in order to express anger without being destructive, you also need to understand what truly made you angry in the first place. Understanding Your Role in the Argument When you fight with your partner, you’re also effectively a cog in the argument machine. The longer you refuse to take a step back, the longer it will keep going. Acknowledging your role in the argument is important, [Read more...]

By Jennifer Slingerland Ryan, Ph.D., LPC|Tags: Allen based therapist, Allen family counseling, fighting fair|

Why You Should Skip Valentine’s Day

They’ve been everywhere you look, it seems like, the past month or so: advertisements and displays for candy, cards, and tangible tokens of affection. It’s Valentine’s Day, and the retailers want you to remember, reminding you at every turn. But that’s exactly why skipping the holiday in favor of adopting a healthier outlook on love is exactly what every couple needs this February. After all, you should love one another every day, not just one specific – and very commercialized – day out of the year. There are lots of good reasons why Valentine’s Day is a misleading occasion, but here are the big ones. 1. Wasted Money Means Wasted and Opportunities While Valentine’s Day and its meaning is interpreted in many different ways, one [Read more...]

By Jennifer Slingerland Ryan, Ph.D., LPC|Tags: Allen based therapist, Allen family counseling|