Sixty percent of those who embark couple counseling end up in divorce. Those odds are staggering, even to a marriage therapist. For that reason alone, it is imperative that you find a therapist that is right for you.
“We are bonding animals. We seek to love and be loved from the moment we emerge from the womb.”
Couple counseling helps us strengthen our bond. We seek to love and be loved from the moment we emerge from the womb. Being in-sync with your partner feels empowering – like someone is unconditionally loving, respecting and cheering you on through all of life’s trials and tribulations. Without that cohesive, unconditional, nurturing person, you struggle. Bigtime. Without a healthy, cohesive couple, every other part of life struggles from parenting to friendships to work. A healthy couple is the hub of the home.
Couple counseling can help. Challenges and obstacles are normal in all marriages. But marriages riddled with fighting, yelling, silence, and tension creates a very lonely place. Couple counseling provides tools for couples who need to learn to communicate better, decide which problems are solvable and which aren’t, and learn to argue more effectively. In marriage, each person brings their own thoughts, beliefs, opinions and personal histories to the relationship. The very differences that bring us together initially in a relationship may be the very thing that tears us apart as our relationship is no longer new. But finding the right therapist is key.
How Couple Counseling Helps
Some seek couple counseling to gain a better understanding of each other and strengthen their emotional connection. Others strive for rebuilding a marriage they feel is otherwise broken and devoid of emotional, spiritual and physical intimacy and connection. Couple counseling can help couples in all types of intimate partnerships – heterosexual, homosexual, married or not married.
Partners are hurting when they reach our office. They are desperately looking to improve a distressed and despairing relationship which usually doesn’t feel like a partnership at all. Many seek marriage counseling to address many specific issues, including:
Sex and intimacy issues
“Our earliest relationships create a blueprint for all other relationships throughout our lifetime.”
What to Expect in Couple Counseling
Couple counseling ideally happens with both partners, but in the event that one partner chooses to not to attend, the therapeutic process is still very useful. Before scheduling sessions with a specific therapist, consider whether the therapist would be a good fit for you and your partner. With 60% of all those attending marriage counseling ending in divorce, it’s important that you know a few things about counseling couples that we feel pretty passionate about:
Most couples are craving only one thing: emotional connection
Most couple’s therapists don’t know how to help couples reconnect emotionally, spiritually or physically because they, like you, think you have a “communication problem”
Most couple’s therapist have had little to no training in conducting couple therapy
Most therapists do not evidenced-based therapies – they are opinion-based
Our therapists use only evidence-based therapy, utilizing training from received from Drs. John and Julie Gottman and Dr. Sue Johnson’s attachment therapy. Jennifer Slingerland Ryan is a Level 3 Gottman trained therapist and is currently seeking EFT certification.
“Making the decision to go to couple counseling can be tough. If you have a troubled relationship; however, ignoring your problems or hoping they get better on their own is a recipe for failure.”