Marriage Expert
Relationships (all of them!) are our most important asset. Our intimate partnership is one of our most important because this is where we’re the most vulnerable, and should feel the most connection and acceptance. I’m a Level 3 Gottman Counselor and Emotional Focused Therapist (EFT). I’m also a Gottman 7 Principles Program Educator, which means I can train couples within groups to be more emotionally cohesive and better communicators (but you probably don’t need better communication in your marriage).
Self-Care Bad***
Work hard, play hard – that’s my motto. I see a lot of people that work really hard, and because of that, I’ve become hyper-focused on helping others understand what real self-care means. I have eight things I teach every single client about self-care. These are the most important things we should be managing on a day-to-day basis in order to become better, healthier, and happier human beings. (I’m putting those all down in a book now, but you’ll be getting this lesson for free in my office, guaranteed!)
Communication Guru
He said, she said…what? One thing my couples would say about me is that I help translate their conversations with each other so they hear each other better. Most couples couple in and tell me they are bad at communicating, but I rarely find this to be the case. We communicate all the time to all kinds of people throughout the day! What we really need is help getting the bottom of the core feelings of our partner. That may sound boring, and “blah blah blah” but if this key ingredient is missing, marriages end because of it. And it’s a pretty slow death.
Researching Tree-Hugger
Research matters, but so does hugging trees! I can tell you all about research in meditation, right before we meditate for example. Here are a few other things you’ll learn from me:
- How early family relationships create a subconscious pattern of behavior in our lives and in relationships of which we engage (marriage, friendships, co-workers, etc.)
- How thoughts, emotions, and actions are interconnected, and how you can change the ones you don’t like
- How early relationships create subconscious belief systems that drive everything we feel and do
- The role personality, intuition, and mindfulness play in the change process
- That homework and journal exercises between sessions make change happen more quickly
- How meditation, self-talk, role-playing, role rehearsal affect the change process
I’m an EFT (Emotionally Focused Therapy) Therapist and have obtained the highest training through intensive training. EFT is based on attachment, which is the bonding we feel with another human being. It is experiential and focuses on people’s experiences in their relationships. How do they express their emotions? What is the dance couples perform with each other? What are their negative patterns?
EFT helps shift negative patterns of engagement and create a more secure emotional bond. Research shows that EFT produces a 70-75% recovery rate. No other couple’s therapy method has more extensive research than EFT; it has been researched over a span of 20 years.
For more information about EFT, click here.
Creator of “Eight Ways to Happy”:
After years of treating people 1:1 in my office, I noticed trends about health care and wellness that were pretty powerful, but also pretty dang simple. So much so that I went back to graduate school a second time when I turned 40 to become an expert on the topic of connection, belongingness, and relationships. (“Dr. Jen here, what seems to be the problem?”)
Get more info about the “Eight Ways to Happy” course and my happiness tools here.