Adam was a 10-year-old boy who evacuated with his family from New Orleans to Texas after Hurricane Katrina. His mother brought him to counseling after she noticed that he had trouble adjusting to his new life in the Lone Star State.
Adam was depressed. Noticeably. The mother’s bubbly boy became sad and soft spoken and gained weight. He could no longer concentrate in school. Bullies picked on him because of his new living arrangements.
Worse still, it was a year since the move to Texas, but Adam was still having a hard time with the transition. And as a 10-year-old kid, he didn’t have the words to articulate his feelings to his parents.
At Adam’s first session, I introduced him to play therapy. He perked up and said, “You mean I don’t have to talk?”
“Only if you want to”, I answered.
Over the next several months, he drew, painted, played board games, and told stories. What he didn’t know was that, while he was playing, he was communicating to me about the problems in his life.
Play therapy works with children like traditional talk therapy with adults. Except with most children, they haven’t yet developed the verbal and cognitive skills to communicate their feelings and thoughts with words. But on the other hand, children are extremely imaginative and creative. So play therapy lets them express themselves in a way that feels natural, safe, and comfortable.
Usually, play therapy is used with children under 12. For some kids, it works immediately and they quickly become comfortable speaking to a therapist. For others, it takes a few weeks of play for them to open up. Even teens who think they are too old “to play” respond well to a combination of art therapy and traditional counseling.
Parents often ask what they can do to help facilitate the same environment I do with their kids.
Here are some things that you, as a parent, can do to encourage the use of play at home as a tool for communication and healthy expression of emotions:
1. Allow your children to be creative in their play-give them the power to decide what and how they want to play. Remember, how they play can tell you a lot about how they’re feeling, even when they can’t verbally express themselves.
2. Create a safe environment for your child. This allows them to feel comfortable when expressing their thoughts and feelings.
3. Pay attention to your child’s playful clues, which will help you interpret what their play may symbolize. Remember, don’t over-analyze. Just like adults sometimes want to “talk it out,” children often want to “play it out” so playing may be all they need to blow off steam!
4. Be comfortable allowing your child to express his feelings. Many parents I have come across as a therapist are limiting their child’s expression of feelings simply because they feel uncomfortable with what their children may say. Be sure that what your child DOESN’T express is far worse than what he or she DOES express.
5. Always be patient with your child. Children are great at picking up on both spoken and unspoken rules and feelings. If your child senses your lack of patience, disinterest, or lack of attention, they are more likely to not open up to you about how they are feeling.
Through these techniques, children learn to identify and express feelings appropriately. How to put words to things like anger, frustration, and embarrassment.
If your child has trouble communicating his or her frustrations, play therapy may be the perfect choice.
So, what happened to Adam, our reason for talking about play therapy? At the end of our time together nearly a year together, Adam came out of his shell. He learned how to stand up to bullies, do better in school, and even asked his mom if he could join the neighborhood basketball team.
Adam was no longer depressed. He was on his way to becoming a happy, well-adjusted child.
Erica S. Gould is a Licensed Professional Counselor helping children, teens, and adults achieve happiness and reach their full potential. She can be reached through her website at http://www.ichoosechange.com/erica.html.
Popularity: 34% [?]
photo credit: imagesofgb4u
Ask a middle school student today if they remember life without the Internet and they will answer, “No.” They have no recollection of using an encyclopedia or card catalogue as their main source of information. In fact, they probably can’t even fathom searching the newspaper for movie times or having to listen to the radio to find out when a favourite band is coming to town. To them, life without the Internet is a foreign concept.
This is how I think most of us are when it comes to illnesses. Whether they are physical (strep throat, headaches) or mental (depression, anxiety), most of us are incapable of considering the variety of treatment options possible. It has become the norm for us to do the same thing anytime something is “wrong” with us: we see a doctor, take medicine/get a shot/get an X-ray/etc., and wait for everything to get better.
Oftentimes we follow this same pattern when it comes to the more illusive psychological aliments with the only possible divergence from our usual routine being that we possibly throw in some psychotherapy or a self-help book.
I’m not saying anything is wrong with this formula. When I realize that strep throat is settling in yet again, I run to the first urgent care clinic I can for an antibiotic script. Even so, it’s good to challenge your standard operating procedures every now and then and at least consider other options. Fortunately, there are a wide variety of alternative therapies available even for something such as depression. Below are snapshots of these treatments methods.
- Herbal Remedies. Herbs have been used for thousands of years to treat illnesses. Some of the common herbs used to treat depression include: St. John’s Wort, Ginko Biloba, Lavendar, Valerian Root, Ginseng, Amino Acid Supplements, and 5-HTP.
- Vitamin and Mineral Therapy. Many people take vitamins and minerals but this alternative treatment may involve taking a wider variety of vitamins/mineral as well as taking different doses than the recommended amount shown on the bottle.
- Acupuncture. This is an ancient Chinese method of healing that prevents and cures specific disease and conditions. The technique involves sticking very fine, solid needles into specific points on the body which prompts the body to produce chemicals that decrease or eliminate painful sensations. The theory is that it stimulates the body’s ability to resist or overcome illnesses and conditions by correcting imbalances.
- Exercise. If you read last week’s article you know why exercise is a super activity. Consistent and adequate exercise can do wonders for the body; not just on the superficial level (size 6 jeans) but in other, less visible ways. Exercise reduces stress and strengthens neurons; both good things when treating depression.
- Reflexology. Reflexologists, like many other natural health practitioners, believe that the body has the capacity to heal itself. In this therapy, nerves related to various parts of the body are manipulated by applying pressure to specific points on the hands and feet. Through this it is thought that the healing process is stimulated.
- Art Therapy. Art therapy is exactly what it sounds like: therapy using art. Art therapy uses a combination of therapeutic techniques along with various art techniques and materials (clay, paints, and chalks) to help people express and heal themselves.
- Biofeedback/Neurofeedback. This treatment relies on sensitive computers that are able to “read†a person’s various internal states. Patients who receive this treatment receive information on how their body responds to certain thoughts, activities, and beliefs. Using this information, patients are then taught how to manage their body reactions. For example, let’s say that, through biofeedback, I learned that my heart starts racing and my mind becomes overly active when I encounter dogs. My therapist would teach me how to control my body reactions so that when I encounter dogs I am better able to handle it.
- Emotional Freedom Therapy/EFT. This relatively new therapy is based on the fact that our bodies are composed of energy. Disruptions in our energy fields cause problems and, according to EFT, healing can occur by tapping on established energy meridians while at the same time thinking of negative emotions.
Popularity: 8% [?]
